Already into Week 5

I cant even believe that 4 weeks have already passed. But I’m happy to say that i have stayed strong and continued to loose 2 lbs per week. I’m down 8lbs and feel amazing. Of course i still wish that i could have that instant result of it all just being gone but its not. The biggest thing is that I’m not dieting….this is going to have to be my life. I allow myself to chill a little on the weekend about the food and alcohol. I mean really whats the point of living if you cant enjoy the things you love and i love food and champagne. And even with allowing myself a little cheating I’m still on track!!!
I have to admit, i have visited Taco bell a few time in the last few weeks…BUT i have learned moderation and just allowing myself my favorite thing and then filling up on water or a healthy snack afterwards. I don’t have such strong cravings for bad food anymore and when i do i indulge just a tiny bit. Its really true when you crave something all you need is a couple bites to satisfy it.
The other thing that helps quite a bit is this intense heat. I spend a lot of time by the pool and swimming helps a lot. I bring healthy food to the pool but all i really want is water!!!! Lots and lots of water!! Seriously if you wanna loose weight, head to somewhere with 105 degree days! hahaha!!
Unfortunately the one habit that i was hoping to quit along with my total body transformation was smoking. And i fear that that habit has gotten worse. I have never been a crazy addicted smoker but i feel the need a lot more now for a ciggy. As i type this now i want to go have one. I really hope that after i have the weight thing a little more under control i can tackle this nasty habit without gaining weight back. And I may of found an interesting substitution….. The other day i was at the jacuzzi and this guy had what looked like a cigarette but the tip light up a fluorescent light. It was cool, but very odd. I asked him about it and he said its an electric cigarette. They allow them everywhere because they do not smoke. Its more to satisfy the cravings, its made with some sort of food dye and its flavored like hookah. I’m thinking this could be the way to go…I spoke with my doctor, he said as far as hes seen with research no harmful effects…hmmm. Its definitely funny, but if it works, what the heck.
Anyways i hope all rest of you are doing well with your weight loss efforts!!! Stay strong girls we can do it!! xoxo


Day 15….Feel the Burn

So here i am. 15 days in and only 6 pounds lighter. I’m not letting it get me discouraged, i was really hoping for a double digit loss already. So to try and kick it up a notch I have decided to lower my carb intake and increase my protein dramatically. My workout has changed to a challenging kickboxing workout with a woman that has the cutest British accent. It makes me more willing to listen to her bark commands i suppose. haha. But trust me I FEEL IT! My abs, my thighs, my arms….oh the pain.
On an other note i have really been trying to get down into the root of where the weight began for me. I hate to say it but eating to fill some sort of void is what i come up with. I gained weight shortly after a few major life changes occurred. I felt (at the time) like i had lost the love of my life. I no longer understood where my religious stand was, and growing up in a religion that controls every aspect of your life….i hate to say it but i was so lost and extremely confuse. I was trying to figure out so many things, and honestly i cant think of a moment where i just sat down and ate a ton of food to replace anything, but i do remember just increasing all portions dramatically. Food became something to do when i was bored on the occasion…but i just really loved food. Especially greasy, horrible, salty food. Dun dun dun…..there’s the weight.
Did you know that a triple whopper with cheese is 1230 calories!! I didn’t, i knew it was bad but WOW. And that burger king mayo is voted the WORST FOOD with 17 grams of fat just in what they put on a burger. I have to admit guilty pleasure…i had whoppers all thru high school and yeah…..could my weight really be attributed to my love for whoppers?
I really am trying to get down to the really reason i allowed myself to gain 80 pounds in one year. How did I not see myself? Was it really that bad and I’m just choosing to forget all that went wrong that year? I know that i can not be rid of this crazy weight until i realize the real reason that i let it get here.
I keep thinking that if i don’t lose it in 12 weeks like i swear to myself that i will, that i will have the weight loss surgery. But then i see all these interviews with woman and men that have this surgery and still have the “fat” mentality. Its scary to think that these people wanted to be skinny so bad and when they finally get it they cant appreciate it because all they can think about is the fat still. I want to be healthy sound, mind and body. It wont be perfect if i am not. And whats the point if i work so hard for this and then am still not happy with me. Im getting there though. Its such a process, im not used to being in my own head so much. I was always so concentrated on my friends and their lives. I really didn’t value what i was feeling or what i wanted to say. But Im getting my voice back now. And it feels so DAMN good.
p.s to my girls that are doing this weight loss thing as well, you guys keep me motivated! We can do it!!! Everyday tell yourself that you are beautiful and amazing.

Day 4..Still going strong

My battles have been fairly easy so far. Honestly its the first two weeks that are easiest for me. I’m worries for what comes after, when the weight sticks a little harder and its not as easy to get up to workout. But I’m staying positive. So far 4 days 4 pounds!! Ive dropped my calorie intake significantly and so far so good. I haven’t been hungry. I have scoured the Internet for low cal foods and recipes. But its all about the fruits and veggies. Cant go wrong there. The girls that are doing this all have very different approaches at how there are going to loose their weight…I’m really interested to see which way works the best. Ive tried the fad diets and the starving yourself and the working out till you want to die….those all are a remedy for failure for me. Its true this is going to have to be my lifestyle not just a 12 week program. I cant go back. Ive been hitting the gym or the pool everyday for at least 45 minutes of intense movement. Its been really lovely having everyone’s support. My wonderful friend Sherrie called me today and she is doing her weight loss challenge too. Shes got 6 weeks to loose about the same as i want to….so were teaming up even though were miles away we can be each others support system. Now i just need someone i can call Late late night when i reeeeeeaaly want burger king. Any takers? haha. Alright off to the gym and then some R&R at the pool. Everyone have a great weekend. Any weight loss tips for me please comment…..I’m taking everything in and trying what works best for me. xoxo

The Weightloss Challenge…

DAY 1-
I have always been a pretty motivated person. If i want something i make it happen. At the age of 21 i knew that i had to go to Italy….I made it happen. I deciede that i wanted to be in the beauty industry and sacrificed 17 hour days to the concept of something better for myself. I decided that I couldnt turn 30 and still be living in the same town with the same thing day in and day out. I was going nowhere and way to fast, so i packed up and moved to Las Vegas. But still yet through all this, i cant seem to take this thing off my body. Im not really sure what has happened…… in the sense of my weight.
I feel like i woke up one day and there it was. Ive never really been open and honest about it, and maybe thats why its still here. Its time to make changes and without honesty how can anything really change. I know that im not the only one that battles this everyday. Im going to say things here that maybe i shouldnt, that maybe people wont want to hear, but its time to heal me and to make it all public is the way that i cant hide behind it anymore.
So heres the deal, at work we have 12 weeks to lose weight for a grand prize for whoever has the greatest loss. For the first time in years I got on a scale for someone other then my Doctor, and its there that real honesty takes place. Ive always been accountable to myself for the weight, but today… i showed someone else the darker side. I understand that im not in hiding, its not like people cant see what i look like. But when you see a number, that large number, it all gets so real.
Im going to be extremely honest here about my daily battles. I expect judgement because many of you that read this may not understand why its so hard to not eat taco bell. I honestly dont understand it myself. Im going to confront some demons and maybe re-learn who i am through these next 12 weeks. Im really excited but very scared. This weight is not who i am, and unfortunately its who i let myself become. Im ready for the work. Im ready for results. Im really ready this time.